Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Ass kicking

Unless you're part of a writing team, putting words to paper is, for the most part, a solitary endeavor and sometimes one that just ain't workin'. The Muse left the building. The train of thought derailed into the Nothing. Characters stand around in the corners of your mind shuffling their feet, flipping you the bird, and calling you a fucking loser. [nodding] Yep, you know exactly what I'm talking about.

It's times like these that I rely on my comrades in ink. Sometimes it's enough just to wander to their blogs, see what's going on. Other times a more immediate response is needed, so a WiD (Writer in Distress) text, email, or phone call goes out. Two of my regular Keepers of the Sanity Keys are Jasmine Haynes and VJ Summers. I admit wholeheartedly that they have dragged me from the very edge on many occasions. It was not a pretty sight. Thank you so much! *mwah* I never underestimate the importance of a venting session.

There are times though when venting just isn't going to do it. Nope, some days call for more drastic measures to be taken. Those times call for a good old-fashioned, honest to god ass-whooping. Now I'm not talking about a little slap on the hand or even a firm twisting of the ear to drag your wayward characters back into the thick of things. No, no, no, my friend. I'm talking about throwing them out through the double-pane window into the backyard and kicking the living hell out of the them. I'll admit, these are probably not scenes that will ever cross an editor's desktop. That's okay. Sometimes just having a few characters bloodied and beaten for a page is all it takes to carry on. 

[looking around]

You seen my baseball bat?

(And for the record, a search of "sexy baseball guy" garners an incredibly fucked up collection of photos that I'll probably never be able to bleach from my brain. And "bloody baseball bat" offered up just as many, though they were disturbing for reasons that should have kept me from doing the damn search in the first place.)